by Rashana A. Hooks
You have a powerful voice and you shouldn’t feel bad when you use it.
Saying sorry is act of kindness that shows yours deepest regret for a transgression or a mistake you’ve made. When used in the right context it can make a huge difference in how you feel and how a person feels about you. By showing pity, it communicates to others that you want to right your wrong.
However there are some things that don’t need to be apologized for. In some instances you have a right to feel or do certain things without feeling obligated to sorry just to appease another person. As women, we have a bad habit of feeling guilty fairly quickly, which in turn makes our usage of “sorry” way to frequent.
Here are few things you should never have to apologize for:
Not Liking Every Family Member
Some things you just can’t control and one of them is being born into the family your in. Some are lucky to have great close knit families who love and enjoy each others company. But then there are some who if they had to be born again, they would not want their current family. Just because you may bear the same last name and blood does not mean you have to like them.
Being You
Have you ever heard of the phrase “Do you!”? Well that’s a perfect reminder to never apologize for being yourself and doing what you have to do for you and only you. People will try to put you in a “box” and limit your capabilities. Don’t fall victim that, be authentically you and let everyone us catch up.
Not loaning your money
Money always breeds problems, especially when you may have a lot of it. But loaning money is another beast. If you don’t feel comfortable loaning your hard earned money to an irresponsible friend or family member don’t apologize for saying no. It’s your right to spend your money how you feel fit. Don’t ever allow anyone to make you feel bad when it comes to how you handle your finances.
Speaking your mind
Expressing how you feel is crucial to your well being. You have a powerful voice and you shouldn’t feel bad when you use it. Saying what’s on your mind let’s others know your opinions and intelligence. Don’t ever begin your sentence with a sorry when you’re trying to get your point across.
Your success
You should never apologize for the things you’ve accomplishments, the accolades you’ve received or the amazing career you have. Your hard work and sacrifice are the reason why you’ve achieved so much. We often down play our success to make other people feel comfortable. I’m not saying you should brag and make someone else feel inferior, but don’t ever apologize for what you’ve worked so hard to obtain.
Wanting to be alone
Like Monica said, “sometimes it’s just one of those days when you want to be left alone.” We all have times when we don’t feel like being bothered or our usual perky selves and we just want to chill alone. It’s ok to feel and do so. Don’t apologize for being human and wanting to be left alone sometimes.
Putting yourself first
We women are so accustomed to putting others needs before our own, that we think it’s the norm. It’s gotten so bad that when we want to put ourselves first we actually feel bad about it because we think it’s the worst thing in the world. If we don’t take care of ourselves and watch our well being, we will be no good to anyone else. So don’t apologize for choosing you.
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Read this article in Madame Noire
Op-ed pieces and contributions are the opinions of the writers only and do not represent the opinions of Y!/YNaija.