by Wale Odunsi

 

This creative groom-to-be proposed to his boyfriend without saying a single word.

In a video posted to Vimeo Saturday, Dave videotaped himself holding up signs explaining why he loves Michael — then, the couple’s friends and family (including their dog!) took turns holding up signs that tell the couple’s love story.

Of course, the video ends with Dave’s proposal.

“So Michael, king of comics, doctor of all things awesome, drill sergeant to anyone in the kitchen, the cutest nerd in the whole wide world, the cheesiest texter and the best friend and partner anyone could ever ask for… What do you say?” Dave’s signs read. “Can we make this thing official? Will you marry me?”

Mike gives his answer using signs, too.

“Yes!! Obviously! I told him like 3 years ago. But I still cried happysies tears today,” his signs read.

Watch the entire proposal in the video above.

Another man proposed in a similar fashion in 2011 by holding up signs containing popular internet memes. Check it out here.

Read more: HuffPost

by Okezie J.S. Nwoka

The Alili is a centipede; a centipede has one hundred legs. That is what it claims. The claim won the acceptance of nearly every animal in the verdant forest, giving her the benefit of an unspoken doubt.  All of the different animals believed her, save one group.  All of the animals were deceived, except for the shrewd and perceptive Tortoise.  When the Alili pranced around the market square with a foul pretentiousness, singing “Look at the wonderful me, and my one hundred legs,” the Tortoise yelled out, “Turn yourself over so that we, your kindred, may count your legs.”  The Alili was shocked, and then angered by the Tortoise challenge.  She knew she could not maintain her façade, so she ran away and became silent for a period of time.

Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie is an alili.  The question, then, becomes “what is her façade?” How has she deceived us, her kindred?  To answer these questions, one must examine how Adichie has crafted and marketed her literary career.  I humbly submit that Adichie has stolen the legacy of a literary giant for the sake of her own personal self-advancement.  Adichie has hijacked the literary memory of Chinua Achebe.  She has done this through the construction of a parasitic Achebe Complex that is made evident through her words and through her work.  From the onset, Adichie has claimed to have a special connection with Achebe, yet a critical analysis of her writing tells a different story.  She finds significance in the fact that she once lived in the same home that Achebe did.  However, what good is that fact when her work continually misses the mark— the mark set by Achebe’s high standards?  Instead of standing on the shoulders of this literary giant and paying him a true homage, she tries to topple him… time and time again.

There are three ways that Adichie does this egregious thing.  Firstly, she inappropriately deploys literary devices.  Second, her characters lack a developed consciousness.  Finally, the morals of her stories are not prophetic enough given the historical moment in which she tells them.  Let us begin counting the legs of the Alili.

The opening line of Adichie’s novel Purple Hibiscus reads, “Things started to fall apart at home when my brother, Jaja, did not go to communion and Papa flung his heavy missal across the room and broke the figurines on the étagère.”  The language here is deliberate.  It is intentional.  Adichie is invoking the spirit of Achebe, and placing it in the typeface of her own text.  However, “the falcon cannot hear the falconer… the centre cannot hold.”  Adichie does not hear the wisdoms of Achebe, and as result the works fails.  Take as one example the two writers’ use of folklore.  Achebe uses the Igbo folklore of Tortoise to speak to the System of Reality (as James Baldwin would call it) of Okonkwo, his protagonist in Things Fall Apart.  Because Tortoise is egocentric and places his desires before those of others, he suffers a tragic fate; his smooth shell is shattered.  Okonkwo too behaves in that manner, and he suffers too.  He commits suicide

Achebe’s poetic reflective-ness between the folklore and the novel’s characters, has no home in Adichie’s work.  She too has a story about Tortoise in Purple Hibiscus, and that story lacks the poetic reflective-ness of which I speak.  Her story of Tortoise cracking his shell is one governed by blackmail and greed.  Because Tortoise desires to survive a famine, he blackmails Dog so that he can indirectly obtain food from Dog’s mother.  Greed takes hold of Tortoise to the point where he deceives Dog’s mother, so as to eat an even larger portion.  The question now is, “which character in her novel has the tendency to both blackmail and be greedy?”  There is none; not one.

The second problem with Adichie’s work, as it relates to her Achebe Complex, is that her characters lack a developed consciousness.  Achebe’s characters act within their surroundings, speaking with history and culture and Nature.  They try to make sense of their System of Reality and imagine new ways of being, developing possibilities across space and time.  Take Obi Okonkwo in No Longer at Ease as an example.  His experiences while studying in England, cause him to rethink Igbo understandings of being and recreate himself as a “modern man”.  He defies the wisdom of the elders who raised money for him to study abroad, causing a generational schism in his family.  He also laments the corruption rampant in a newly independent Nigeria, and is constantly negotiating how to “be” within the borders of a nation defiled.  He then engages in forbidden love, expanding the possibility of the privileged sharing a romance with the outcast.  All of these factors make the moment when Clara, his lover, reveals her identity as an osu both powerful and power-filled.  It is in his reaction.  Instead of Obi jumping to embrace Clara to touch her and to kiss her, Achebe tells us that he was silent.

Adichie’s characters do not do this.  They simply react to the forceful hand of their writer, not living in the moment of their literary existence.  Take for example Ugwu in Adichie’s Half of a Yellow Sun.  In most of the novel, he is portrayed as an incredibly docile boy sent to work for a university professor and his wife.  We see him live in the shadows of the home, as a lowly servant.  We see him play with, feed, and protect Baby, the couple’s daughter.  We see him as an innocent.  Then something happens.  Ugwu is kidnapped by Biafran forces to fight, and without any notice at all the Ugwu that we know flips. He becomes a fearless soldier and a heartless rapist.  This moment, unlike that of Obi Okonkwo’s, is strange and bizarre.  One sees the same thing in Purple Hibiscus.  Every reader of Adichie must ask themselves this question, “Did it “make sense” for Jaja to protect his mother by turning himself in to the police?”  In my opinion, it made no sense.  Adichie forced that decision upon Jaja; Jaja did not act on his own volition.  The novel does not provide any signal, not even a whisper, to illustrate and contextualize Jaja’s System of Reality.  As a consequence, when Jaja sacrifices himself, it seems as though he does so as a slave of the text.  .

The third problem with Adichie is that her stories lack the prophetic gravitas necessary to challenge the social problems of her contemporary moment.  She writes just to write.  Now, there is no problem with writing for the sake of writing.  In fact, doing so can lead to new and innovative literary expressions.  However, if one chooses to write that way, one ought not claim to be something else.  Do not be a puddle calling yourself an ocean.  Achebe’s work was and still is a critical component of human liberation.  In his text Home and Exile, he writes, “I did not really want to see the score of narratives between me and my detractor settled by recourse to power, other than the innate power of stories themselves.”   He knew that freedom could not be attained through the barrel of a gun, but through the broad exchange of human narratives.  Achebe’s writing prophetically spoke to a historical moment filled with holocausts and wars.  It was a modernist moment, yet his writing transcended that moment by speaking to something larger, something bettered.  The battles of today have new morphologies and writers writing on the shoulders of Achebe must adapt.  Writing prophetically in a post-modernist moment requires humbling one’s narrative for the sake of allowing other narratives to exist, no matter how “bad” they are.  It is a game of convincing and cajoling, not one of force.  The meta-narrative has been damned.

The question, I now ask is, “How could the literary community even consider Adichie to be Achebe’s protégé when she does not speak prophetically in the post-modernist moment”?  In a CNN interview, Adichie talks of banning Western stories like Cinderella, banning them as if this were the Third Reich.  This deeply contradicts Achebe’s ideological position, a position that allowed for all stories to exist.  Adichie’s novels are not about making the world better.  They are about selling themselves.  A friend of mine tried to convince me of the opposite by defending Adichie’s contributions to feminism, particularly as it relates to Nigerian women.  I responded to her with the following:

There are so many problems with Adichie’s work I do not even know where to begin.  Suffice to say middle-upper class Nigerian women have a system of reality that differs drastically from poor Nigerian women.  How, then, does Chimamanda dare to speak on behalf of those impoverished women?  How dare she?

I would not dare criticize any woman’s right to share her narrative.  But when there is an attempt to [use] that narrative to eclipse another’s narrative, there is a PROBLEM.  Adichie did not begin anything!  Read the works of Yvonne Vera of Zimbabwe and you will see an African woman who understood feminism and womanhood.  Read Butterfly Burning; your eyes will open.  To say that African [women] have not [begun] a dialogue about their womanhood pre-Adichie is simply ahistorical.

It is here that you may be asking yourselves, “Who the hell is this kid?”  Well, I am an Igbo-American who wants to continue in the tradition of prophetic liberation writers like Chinua Achebe, Toni Morrison, Yvonne Vera, and others.  A few months ago the Writers’ Workshop at the University of Iowa extended an invitation to me to join their community of writers as a Masters in Fine Arts student.  And I am thrilled.  I am also fearful, fearful that the greatest literary minds can be quickly deceived— tricked into thinking that something is,  what it is not.  I have been consoled by one of my favorite African writers, a man who I consider to be my literary father, a man who said that I should not worry about such things.  Still, the treatment of Black literature by the West concerns me, and I hope there can be more dialogue centered on resolving this issue once and for all, once and for everyone.

I admire Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie a great deal.  She is, in fact, one of the reasons I applied to MFA programs in the first place.  The way she draws parallels to Achebe is the way I draw parallels to her.  She was born on September 15th, which is three days before my birthday.  She was born in 1977 and I was born in 1988, i.e. repeating digits.  We are the same shade of brown.  We both have parents who pushed us to study medicine.  The list goes on.  Still, I refuse to let my love for Chimamanda jeopardize the fate of African literature and the future of my own stories.  I do not know if Chimamanda ever met Chinua Achebe.  I have.  As a student of Brown University and a concentrator of its Africana Studies Department, I have interacted with Chinua Achebe several times.  The first time I told him my name, he let out an “Oooooohhh Okezie!” as if we had met before, as if we were old friends.  I remember that moment, because it was the moment that I decided to try to continue his project, the project of our ancestors, the project of being free.  Don’t you want that? Don’t you want that Chimamanda?  Let me count your legs.  Something tells me that with time, you will have one hundred.

*Read the original piece on SaharaReporters

A young woman who faced a life-threatening illness has finally succumbed to a fate she fought so hard against.

Jessica Clark, a 22-year-old University of South Carolina student, has died in North Carolina from Primary Pulmonary Hypertension after battling chronic rejection from her second lung-transplant.

According to WIS-TV Clark, who had planned her own funeral, had raised over $7,000 for the Lung Transplant Foundation before her death Thursday morning.

Jessica Clark was optimistic after receiving her second lung transplant at 21-years-old

Jessica’s mother Katie Clark, who died when she was just ten-years-old after undergoing two lung transplants, was a source of inspiration for the University student

At eight Clark was diagnosed with PPH and received her first lung transplant, which her body rejected.

She received her second lung transplant at Duke Medical Center when she was 21-years-old. The day after the transplant she suffered a stroke.

About that setback she wrote, ‘my stroke brought me to the depths of who I truly am.’

In September Clark shared her story with WIS-TV in South Carolina. Her mother had undergone the same ordeal when she was just a child and died before she was ten.

Katie Clark had two double-lung transplants before dying from chronic rejection.

According to Jessica, her mother was her inspiration.

There is no long-term treatment for anybody suffering from chronic rejection, a rare condition that Jessica’s mother also had

‘For the next 10 years [my mom] taught me courage, to live life fully, to never take no for an answer and to never give up,’ she wrote on her fundraising page.

Jessica Clark wanted to share her story because the disease is incurable and there are no options for long-term treatment.

In lieu of flowers, the Clark family is asking those who want to pay their respects to Jessica to make a donation to the Lung Transplant Foundation.

According to the American Lung Association, PPH is three times more common in women than men.

Read more: Daily Mail UK

by Barack Obama

Good evening.  Tonight our nation is in debt to the people of Boston and the people of Massachusetts.  After a vicious attack on their city, Bostonians responded with resolve and determination.  They did their part as citizens and partners in this investigation.

Boston police and state police and local police across the Commonwealth of Massachusetts responded with professionalism and bravery over five long days.  And tonight, because of their determined efforts, we’ve closed an important chapter in this tragedy.

I’ve been briefed earlier this evening by FBI Director Mueller.  After the attacks on Monday, I directed the full resources of the federal government to be made available to help state and local authorities in the investigation and to increase security as needed.  Over the past week, close coordination among federal, state, and local officials — sharing information, moving swiftly to track down leads — has been critical to this effort.

They all worked as they should, as a team.  And we are extremely grateful for that.  We owe a tremendous debt of gratitude to all our outstanding law enforcement professionals.  These men and women get up every day, they put on that uniform; they risk their lives to keep us safe — and as this week showed, they don’t always know what to expect.  So our thoughts are with those who were wounded in pursuit of the suspects and we pray for their full recovery.

We also send our prayers to the Collier family who grieve the loss of their son and brother, Sean.  “He was born to be a police officer,” said his chief at MIT.  He was just 26 years old.  And as his family has said, he died bravely in the line of duty, doing what he committed his life to doing — serving and protecting others.  So we’re grateful to him.

Obviously, tonight there are still many unanswered questions.  Among them, why did young men who grew up and studied here, as part of our communities and our country, resort to such violence?  How did they plan and carry out these attacks, and did they receive any help?  The families of those killed so senselessly deserve answers.  The wounded, some of whom now have to learn how to stand and walk and live again, deserve answers.

And so I’ve instructed the FBI and the Department of Homeland Security and our intelligence community to continue to deploy all the necessary resources to support the investigation, to collect intelligence, and to protect our citizens.  We will determine what happened.  We will investigate any associations that these terrorists may have had.  And we’ll continue to do whatever we have to do to keep our people safe.

One thing we do know is that whatever hateful agenda drove these men to such heinous acts will not — cannot — prevail.  Whatever they thought they could ultimately achieve, they’ve already failed.  They failed because the people of Boston refused to be intimidated.  They failed because, as Americans, we refused to be terrorized.  They failed because we will not waver from the character and the compassion and the values that define us as a country.  Nor will we break the bonds that hold us together as Americans.

That American spirit includes staying true to the unity and diversity that makes us strong — like no other nation in the world.  In this age of instant reporting and tweets and blogs, there’s a temptation to latch on to any bit of information, sometimes to jump to conclusions.  But when a tragedy like this happens, with public safety at risk and the stakes so high, it’s important that we do this right.  That’s why we have investigations.  That’s why we relentlessly gather the facts.  That’s why we have courts.  And that’s why we take care not to rush to judgment — not about the motivations of these individuals; certainly not about entire groups of people.

After all, one of the things that makes America the greatest nation on Earth, but also, one of the things that makes Boston such a great city, is that we welcome people from all around the world — people of every faith, every ethnicity, from every corner of the globe.  So as we continue to learn more about why and how this tragedy happened, let’s make sure that we sustain that spirit.

Tonight we think of all the wounded, still struggling to recover.  Certainly we think of Krystle Campbell.  We think of Lingzi Lu.  And we think of little Martin Richard.  Their lives reflected all the diversity and beauty of our country, and they were sharing the great American experience together.

Finally, let me say that even as so much attention has been focused on the tragic events in Boston, understandably, we’ve also seen a tight-knit community in Texas devastated by a terrible explosion.  And I want them to know that they are not forgotten.  Our thoughts, our prayers are with the people of West, Texas, where so many good people lost their lives; some lost their homes; many are injured; many are still missing.

I’ve talked to Governor Perry and Mayor Muska and I’ve pledged that the people of West will have the resources that they need to recover and rebuild.  And I want everybody in Texas to know that we will follow through with those commitments.

All in all, this has been a tough week.  But we’ve seen the character of our country once more.  And as President, I’m confident that we have the courage and the resilience and the spirit to overcome these challenges — and to go forward, as one nation under God, indivisible, with liberty and justice for all.

Thank you very much, everybody.

by Isi Esene

Kehinde Bamigbetan, the chairman of Ejigbo Local Council Development Authority (LCDA), who was kidnapped on Monday by unknown men has been released.

Bamigbetan was abducted while on his way home after the close of work on Monday as he was about  entering his street, Ona Iwa Mimo Street, Ori-Oke, before Egbe Bridge in Ejigbo, at about 11pm.

A crowd of well-wishers are said to be keeping vigil at his residence anxiously awaiting his return.

The circumstances of his release is still unclear but reports say he was released after parting with N20million ransom money.

We shall bring you details as soon as we get it.

According to online records televangelist and recording artist Dr. Juanita Bynum, 54, who has made controversial headlines in the past was arrested and held in Dallas, Texas County Jail on Thursday night for civil charges.

Bynum, who was in route to minister at a hotel in Dallas but was taken into custody for a Capias Warrant, which is generally issued for money owed based on a court judgement or failure to appear for a civil hearing.

The civil case was allegedly filed by promoter Al Washington and as of Friday afternoon Bynum was being held in Dallas County Jail without bond. No further information has been released.

Read more: Essence

Kathy Dunderdale’s Twitter account is now history after it was discovered that the Newfoundland and Labrador Premier had been following a porn account that served up X-rated videos. The deletion of @kathydunderdale came on Wednesday night, though it’d been more than a year since Dunderdale last posted on Twitter — an intentional leave according to the politician.

“I have not used my Twitter account for over a year very purposefully — I have decided to disengage from Twitter,” she said Thursday. “Is there some requirement that I have to read every letter, read every email, have a Twitter account, be engaged in Facebook? I have all kinds of opportunity to hear from the people of Newfoundland and Labrador, and I have the freedom to choose which one of those, or how many of those tools, that I’m going to use.”

Nonetheless, until this week the account remained visible, but the porn link seemed to be the last straw for Dunderdale. “When I found that somebody had attached disturbing material to my account, I disassociated myself with it immediately and took it down immediately.”

The humbling lessons of social media

The snafu is doubly embarrassing since Dunderdale has been waging something of a public feud with New Democrat Gerry Rogers. Finding that Rogers, a Member of House Assembly, was part of a Facebook group responsible for posting threats toward the N.L. Premier, her political opponents sought a bit of retribution by having Rogers ejected from the assembly Tuesday. Rogers maintains she was added to the Facebook group “Dunderdale Must Go!” unknowingly.

“As an MHA, when you’re on Facebook, when you’re engaged in Twitter, then you have to have an obligation to pay attention,” Dunderdale would say on Tuesday. If it wasn’t clear before, Dunderdale now understands that such caution should be exhibited by everyone up the chain.

Read more: The Verge

She’s already known for sexy, flesh-baring costumes on ABC’s Dancing with the Stars.

And Australian dancer Kym Johnson stripped down naked for PETA’s latest campaign fighting animal testing.

The 36-year-old hoofer cuddled a bunny and flaunted her athletic physique in two different pin-up poses on print ads, shot by photographer Robert Sebree, released Friday.

And Kym isn’t the only Dancing with the Stars alumni to drop trou for the sake of animals.

Pamela Anderson, Karina Smirnoff, Elisabetta Canalis, Joanna Krupa, Kelly Osbourne, Wendy Williams, and judge Carrie Ann Inaba have all joined the fight while baring flesh.

Ironically, PETA’s scantily clad ads have spurned criticism from feminists organisations in the past.

The accompanying one-minute video showcases both Kym’s tanned and toned flesh as well as graphic images of wounded lab rabbits.

Read more: Daily Mail UK

Empress Njamah is a former AMAA nominee for Best Supporting Actress for her turn in the film, ‘Bank job’. Our Wilfred Okiche  caught up with her in Bayelsa just before the big event and she zipped through the following questions:

What has Empress Njamah been up to? You have been out of the scene for some time now

I am currently based in Abuja where I am building a thriving business. It is not easy. Abuja because Lagos is one place where there is a lot of competition, it’s cut-throat. When a lot of people see you doing well in your stuff, they all want to get into it too so I can’t deal with that. I am loving Abuja right now. I have partners I do business with in Lagos though.

Did you fall out of love with acting?

You don’t fall out of love. We all need love and need to give love. But if you are giving your love to the wrong person, you won’t get it back. Just because a lot of people say stuff out of depression doesn’t mean it’s true. You don’t fall out of love with acting, it is always there. A lot of us are born actors and the industry does not have an expiry date, it Is always there. I could come back 10 years from now and still act as a mother so there is always a role for anyone.

What is the latest with you acting career, any new movies lined up?

Something is always happening. Someone offering me a script today is new,  I turn down a script tomorrow, it’s new. So things are always happening. I have shot two movies this year. One is being edited, the other one has been edited. It is going to be premiered in the UK, a sort of collaboration between Nollywood and UK. I try so hard to do the movies that are worth it because the industry is full of talented people. Most people don’t go far because there are loads of distraction once you come in. but I think with where I have gotten in the industry, I don’t think I should be everywhere. I think I should be where is necessary.

Is AMAA necessary?

Oh it is definitely. I am a past nominee so I am always happy to be here in Bayelsa anytime.

But you come from a great acting family. Do you not worry about trying to live up to the good name?

A good name will always be known even if you are out for 5 or 10 years. I know people who have done loads and loads of movies and are still unknown and people who have only 1 good film and it keeps them relevant. Funke Akindele had been in the industry forever and it took ‘Jenifa’ to make her the force that she is today. Even if she is not in every film tomorrow, her work will always be remembered.

What movie will you be remembered with?

Oh that’s easy. It is ‘Girls hostel’. Till today I am shocked when people still call me Tunica Roberts. And when I hear it I’m like ‘Ah e don tey.’ There is always a breakthrough for someone.

What is it about you that attracts controversy

I don’t know about controversy but I guess that a lot of people think that without me they cannot sell their magazines.

But why are you such a magazine seller?

Because I like people to make money, you know fill their pockets, improve their lives. Seriously though, what is controversy? That people write stuff they know isn’t true just to sell? That people want to read that kind of stuff? Most times people just give the people what they want, It doesn’t have to be true. That is controversy.

You are positively glowing, are you in love?

Everyone is in love with something. Somebody. Somehow.  Same for me

by Akan Ido

Artiste, Tiwa Savage posted this photo online showing herself with EME wonder-kid, Wizkid.

The MAVIN first lady posted it with the caption: “@wizkidayo making faces lol we like to partyyyy.”

Just in-case you have a wandering mind, both artiste are affiliated with the  Pepsi brand.

Dzhokhar Tsarnaev‘s last stand was more of a last cower.

A barrage of gunfire erupted on the typically quiet suburban street, turning it into a chaotic scene of loud blasts, nervous townspeople and a wounded fugitive.

Tsarnaev was trapped in the boat he crawled into for a last-ditch hideout.

Soon after the bullets started flying, Tsarnaev surrendered.

The Boston Marathon bombing suspect is thought to have holed up in the 22-foot boat behind a Watertown, Mass. home, after his shootout with the cops the night before. As he hid Friday, a citywide lockdown kept residents indoors.

Less than an hour after authorities lifted the order, local man David Henneberry walked into the backyard of his 67 Franklin St. home for a cigarette and spotted the suspected 19-year-old terrorist, stewing in his own blood. Henneberry dialed 911.

Police hurried to the scene around 7 p.m. and surrounded the boat. Henneberry’s neighbors tensed up in their houses as the final shootout inched closer. Other peered out their windows to see what they could.

User-generated cellphone videos that purportedly show the gunfight, frightened citizens and the fallout have been picked up by local news outlets. Boston stations, such as ABC 5 WCVB and Fox 25 WCVB, shared a video they say shows the last clash, as recorded from a nearby home.

The loud shots shook up Watertown close to where the  previous night’s shootout occurred, when Tsarnaev’s older brother Tamerlan Tsarnaev, 26, was shot dead.

During that fight, the suspects reportedly used the same type of bomb that detonated at the Boston Marathon, reported CBS News.

“They have explosives, some type of grenades,” a cop said during the shootout. “They are in between the houses down here. Shots fired, shots fired. Loud explosions!”

This time, however, Tsarnaev was wounded and incapable of eluding capture again. He finally surrendered and police were ordered to hold fire, authorities said.

Tsarnaev was taken to the Beth Israel Deaconess Hospital in Boston where he is in serious condition.

President Barack Obama vowed Friday night to uncover the bombers’ motivation for killing three people and wounding many more at Monday’s race.

“Obviously tonight there are many unanswered questions,” Obama said. “Among them, why did young men who grew up and studied here, as part of our communities and country, resort to such violence?”

by Hauwa Gambo

No, we’re not letting the matter rest! The world is still trying to wrap its head around the spectacle of Liverpool player, Luis Suarez “appearing to bite” (yeah, the Brits are big on that innocent-until-proven-guilty thing) Chelsea’s Branislav Ivanovic, as captured by television cameras.

[WATCH: Not his first time - Suarez bit fellow player in 2010]

And, of course, Twitter was on hand to extend the frontiers of that priceless moment. Herewith, from the snark factory, our 10 best ripostes:

Goats don’t bite,he’s a Dog “@omojuwa: Someone called Luis Suarez a goat. I could only ask for the breed.”

— Senior Advocate (@sirdickyawa) April 21, 2013

Ivanovic crossed himself off after the bite. The guy was warding off tetanus…

— The Cunnin’ Linguist (@AfroVII) April 21, 2013

Apropos Luis Suarez, which defenders in world football would be the best/worst to eat?

— Africa is a Country (@AfricasaCountry) April 21, 2013

Was there blood?

— Madame Koi Koi (@Reine_LaGlace) April 21, 2013

Suarez took his pound of flesh and I ain’t talking about that last minute goal:D #Chelsea #Suarez

— Steko (@Steve_eko) April 21, 2013

Suaaareeeezzzz!!!! God bless u jare! One assist, one handball, one yellow card, one biting, and one goal… =)) #Arsenal Fans:D

— Ik Tripz(@iktripz) April 21, 2013

Any Mike Tyson and Suarez picstitch yet?

— Ebuka Obi-Uchendu (@Ebuka) April 21, 2013

https://twitter.com/ayoshonaiya/status/326024531582017536

https://twitter.com/clubnaija/status/326026598274961409

And of course, what would a Premier League match be if Piers Morgan didn’t weigh in?

https://twitter.com/piersmorgan/status/326016347647647745

Oil bunkerers and illegal refinery operators in Niger-Delta, Saturday, demanded for amnesty and reparation from the Federal Government for them to stop oil theft in the region.

They said in a statement by their spokesperson, White Tamana, obtained by Sunday Vanguard, that their call was sequel to the on-going arrangement by government to grant amnesty to members of the terrorist Islamic sect, Boko Haram.

The group also called for the release of its members arrested by government for involvement in oil bunkering.

It admitted that bunkering activities of its members in recent times led to the shutdown of AGIP in Southern Ijaw local government area of Bayelsa State and reduction in daily production of petroleum products.

It, however, warned: “We will continue to participate in the illicit trade until the Federal Government offers us amnesty and reparation or indemnification for our property, such as the refineries, boats, and houses being destroyed by the government.”

File photo: Illegal refineries being destroyed.

According to the group, ‘’We expect government to encourage and complement us for coming up with this lucrative inventory skills to help government create millions of jobs for Nigerians”.

Its words, “Besides, the operators demanded immediate release of all of their operators, who are in detention, and then, government should convey a round table discussion”.

The oil bunkerers said heavy military presence, burning of boats and refinery ports in the region would not stop them from continuing with the business.

“It has been recorded that the business also grow large in the region, as many of the powerful businessmen acquire  weapons to fight security operatives to continue their sabotage, which has led to the death of many security operatives in the region,” it asserted.

Tamana explained, “Local refinery operators are the main agitators in N-Delta region, the struggle is divided into two perspectives, the militants and the oil refinery operators.”

‘’The government has only succeeded in identifying with militants, but not knowing that we are more stronger  than  militants, the government mistake us to be militants, we are different from militants,  that is why amnesty offer to militant does not put stop to activities oil bunkering and local refinery operations.

‘’Our operation give us a sense of belonging, we don’t steal oil, oil in the Niger-Delta region is our property, how do you steal something which belong to you .

‘’It is the federal government that is stealing from us with their animalistic laws of on –shore and offshore dichotomy laws.

‘’We have decided to crumble Nigeria economy to stop them from exploiting us, if amnesty is not given to us.

‘’We are not happy that our people die of hunger and disease epidemic due to the oil exploration and exploitation, while others enjoys our oil money freely without looking back.

‘’We must take what belong to us by force, any attempt to stop our operation by force will reignite militancy in the region, such will be worse than what we are seeing today, burning of our operational camps cannot stop our operations, the more the JTF burn our camps, the more we spring up,” he said.

Read more: Vanguard

by Hauwa Gambo

First, he promised critics and nay-sayers that he would never quit his job as chairman of the Chairman of the Subsidy Re-investment and Empowerment Programme, SURE-P, set up by the government of Goodluck Jonathan to manage monies that were supposedly saved from reduction in amount spent on fuel subsidy. Then on Tuesday, April 9, aides reacted to rumours that he was in fact quitting the assignment. They denied it.

Apparently, that’s all a smokescreen, according to this Premium Times report.

“The question is not whether I should resign or not but when,” they report Dr. Kolade telling confidants in Lagos recently.

What seems to be the problem, sir?

Mr. Kolade’s grouse is hinged on the negation of his terms of accepting the job in the first place, which is non-interference in operational implementation and in reporting structure.

Sources said Mr. Kolade is frustrated by the continuous political interference in his operations by the Vice President, Namadi Sambo.

“Dr. Kolade thinks that the vice president has become the key interfering mechanism in the sure-p mandate at this point,” a source said.

PREMIUM TIMES learnt that Mr. Sambo got himself into the mix through a mechanism he helped engineer, called the State Implementation Committee, SIC; designed to recruit 5000 unemployed graduates in each state.

One of the mandate of the SURE-P is to create jobs for thousands of Nigerians across the country. While the SURE-P board favoured the National Directorate of Employment, NDE, as a recruiting body, the vice president favoured the creation of the so called SIC.

In no time, the SIC became a drain pipe for recruiting all forms of political associates and passing easy money to them, our source said.

“The State Implementation Committee has become constant avenue to grab money and build political ambitions,” associates felt the Chairman now believes.

Part of the difficulty also appears to be the secretary of the SURE-P committee, Nze Akachuckwu Nwankpo, a close aide to President Goodluck Jonathan, who reportedly has an ambition to be Governor in Anambra State, when elections are held there later this year.

“Nwankpo’s priorities appear to lean in support of programmes that will assist 2015 aspirations, and that of President Jonathan,” a source said.

Family sources said pressure is also mounting on Mr. Kolade to save his reputation and walk away from the job. Mr. Kolade is noted for the belief that one must always complete what one starts, but relations are telling him that progress is not only measured in those terms.

“There are things people start but cannot complete,” a relative said.

The Vice-President gives a rather confusing response to the allegation of interference however.

“The Vice President has no business with the SURE-P. Whatever the SURE-P does, it’s their business. Since the SURE-P was created for independent public, why then will the vice president have interest in SURE-P?” Umar Sani, Mr. Sambo’s spokesperson, said.

“The Vice President only interferes when he realises that the work is slow or maybe work is not going well.”

Mr. Sani also admitted that his boss co-ordinated the list of the thousands of people to be employed by the program.

“The Vice President only collected list of those to be employed by all states and then handed it over to the SURE-P to take over,” he said.

“There are people who want to cause confusion there (in SURE-P) by carrying such rumours. So please dismiss such rumour that the vice president asked the chairman to issue employment letters.”

Mr. Egbunike, the SURE-P spokesperson, declined comments on the level of interference in its activities by the vice president. He referred all our enquiries to Mr. Kolade, who hardly talks to the press.

Now, when the SURE-P spokesperson asks the media to speak directly to the SURE-P chairman, we guess it is safe to say that, yes, things have fallen apart.

by Chi Ibe

Here is the remix of D’Banj’s ‘Scape Goat’ featuring GOOD Music boss, Kanye West.

The original Scapegoat beats was reportedly by Don Jazzy and was first released in September 2010 but this new one is hot!!

Click here to download the audio of ‘Scapegoat’ below

  D’banj – Scapegoat Remix ft Kanye West (4.1 MiB, 150 hits)

She stood at the start line in flawless make-up and some delicate pearl earrings – ready to run 26.2 miles in memory of her late father.

And Katherine Jenkins was undoubtedly proud of herself as she completed the London Marathon in five hours twenty-six minutes, crossing the finish line with her hand over her heart – a silent tribute to those who had lost their lives in the Boston Bombings.

The Welsh singer was running in memory of her father Selwyn, who died when she was 15 after losing a battle with lung cancer – she revealed she had raised more than £22,000 for Macmillan.

Respectful: Katherine Jenkins pays her respects to the victims of the Boston bombings as she accepts her medal for completing the London Marathon with her hand on her heart

Katherine said she was running in memory of her father and to show solidarity to people affected by the bombings in the US.

‘Like everyone else, it was just so devastating to see that on the news,’ she said.

‘But I think we all feel more than ever that we want to do this and show our support for Boston.’

Victory: Katherine looked thrilled to have crossed the finish line after pounding the pavements

Proud: Katherine was among 36,000 who attempted the marathon

After finishing the race Katherine posted a celebratory tweet: ‘We did it! Amazing support from the crowds – couldn’t have done it without you! And well over 20k raised for Mac!’

The 32-year-old, who like many of the 36,000 runners wore a black ribbon in a show of solidarity to those affected by the terror strikes at the finish of the Boston Marathon last Monday, looked thrilled to be at the finish line.

She said: ‘I wanted to run it in support of Macmillan. My father passed away from cancer when I was 15 and the Macmillan nurses came and they were wonderful.’

Nervous but excited! Katherine Jenkins gets ready to run 26.2 miles in memory of her late father

For dad: Katherine is running for her late father who died when she was 15 after losing his battle with lung cancer

Ready to run! Katherine stretches before she joins the 35,000 other runners for the London Marathon

She added: ‘I really don’t think of myself as an athletic person at all.

‘I never in a million years thought I would do this. I’m glad that I am, but I am nervous.’Katherine posed up before the race wearing minimal make-up and a black ribbon in memory of the victims of the Boston Bombings.

Other celebrities running included Amy Childs, Nikki Sanderson and Sophie Anderton.

In memory: Katherine is running the marathon to raise money for Macmillan, in memory of her late father Selwyn who lost his battle with lung cancer when she was just a teenager

Refreshed: Katherine takes it easy for the first half of the marathon

‘For dad’: The 32-year-old singer posted a picture of her running shirt, which has a picture of her father printed on the frontAmy had her boyfriend David Peters by her side as she made it round the course in 5 hours 47 minutes.

The former The Only Way Is Essex star, said she was determined to not to be put off by the explosions and wanted to raise money for their charities.

Amy, 22, who is running for the British Heart Foundation, said: ‘Everything that happened in Boston has made me even more determined to run.’

They’re all winners! Harry Judd and newsreader Sophie Raworth cross the finish line

Ready to go: Amy Childs is running for British heart Foundation

Determined: Amy Childs said events in Boston had more even more focused on running today

Hollyoaks actress, Nikki impressively finished the race in 4 hours 2 minutes, a time Sophie was hoping to achieve, however her result came up as 6 hours 52 minutes.

The former lingerie model first ran the London Marathon in 2006, but her training lasted for just three weeks, and she completed the race in four hours forty-five minutes.

Harry Judd proved a winner yet again, getting one of the best celebrity running times of 3 hours 31 minutes, while Sophie Raworth stormed the 26.1 miles in 3 hours 44 minutes.

Come on Childs: Amy gets some motivational words from a fellow runner

Loving support: The reality TV star’s boyfriend David Peters was there to spur his girl on

Take a break: Amy has a breather part-way round the course

Amanda Mealing, 45, best known for playing Connie Beauchamp in Holby City, said: ‘The fact that the event is going ahead after what happened in Boston is testament to the spirit of everyone involved with the marathon.

‘It attracts such a diverse mix of professional athletes and regular people that it really symbolises the belief that you just have to keep going.’

She is running for Breast Cancer Care after being diagnosed with breast cancer in 2002 and completed the race in 4 hours 57 minutes.

Dozens of other celebrities taking part in the London race have pledged to wear black ribbons and observe the period of silence before the start in memory of the Boston Marathon bomb victims.

Raring to go: Amanda Mealing, best known for playing Connie in Holby City was prepared for the 26.2 mile marathon

Record breaker: Sophie Anderton wants to beat her four hours and forty-five minute record

Go girl! Nikki Sanderson shows off her guns at the starting line

Five stars for effort! Michel Roux and  Andrew Strauss get ready to embark on the run

BBC Breakfast sports presenter Mike Bushell, who has run the London Marathon several times, added: ‘The feeling you get from the London crowd is amazing. It’s like being part of the biggest team in the world.’

On Friday night Katherine rounded off her UK tour with a performance at London’s 02 arena.

Following the performance the blonde beauty did let her hair down attending the after-show party, although it’s unlikely she indulged in alcohol ahead of her big race.

After her performance Katherine tweeted: ‘ThankU London – U were awesome! A great last nite.Now for some end of tour partying…’

Labouring on! Ed Balls MP completed the marathon in just over five hours

On your mark! Katherine leads the back with Sophie Anderton

Photo: Shutterstock

Low on cash? Florida’s here to help you out with one of its signature, foolproof money-making schemes: stealing baby formula.

The Sun Sentinel reports the fall of baby formula’s Bonnie and Clyde, Sonya Barbour and Glen Martin. Date night for the couple meant a jaunt to a Palm Springs Walmart, where they attempted to run off with two dozen cans of formula. On Thursday morning, Barbour, 32, and her fiance Martin, 31, placed the cans in their infant son’s baby stroller and covered their haul with a blanket. The lumpy ghost-baby looked suspicious to a couple of Walmart employees and a police officer, who eventually found 117 more cans of the stuff lodged behind their front car seats.

Their stash is worth about $2,389, cash that they normally use to buy formula of a more adult variety; the couple said they spend about $200 a day on pain pills combined.

Martin said he’s stolen about 500 cans a week for the past six months, while Barbour sells them to a lady she meets in a grocery store parking lot. So far, Martin managed to rake in about $90,000.

In the past week alone, southern grocery stores have seen a rash of baby formula thievieries. Kroger stores in Tennessee recently installed security cameras in the baby aisles of their stores in order to protect the pricey items.

For other frugal couples looking to save money on a newborn, there’s always breast milk—though it doesn’t sell quite as well.

Read more: Gawker

A U.S. academic has been gang raped in Papua New Guinea by nine armed men who hacked off her blonde hair and left her husband tied naked to a tree.

The 32-year-old woman, who was conducting research into exotic birds in a remote forest on Karkar Island, was walking along a bush track with her husband and a guide on Friday when they were set upon by the gang armed with knives and rifles.

Her husband and the guide were stripped and bound by the men, who then used a bush knife to hack off the woman’s hair before raping her in a terrifying ordeal lasting 20 minutes.

‘Act of animals’: The U.S. academic, 32, was with her husband and a guide when they were ambushed by nine men armed with rifles and knives – she was gang raped and her blonde hair hacked off

The woman chose to speak out about the horrific attack – condemned by the country’s prime minister Peter O’Neil as ‘the cowardly act of animals’ – to highlight the violence that women in Papua New Guinea experience.

The U.S. woman, who posed for a photograph but did not want to reveal her identity, spoke to media in Port Moresby as she and her husband waited for a flight to leave the country.

‘I was walking along a bush track with my husband and our guide when we were ambushed by nine men armed with rifles and knifes,’ she said.

Relaying an ordeal that has sent shock waves throughout the country, the woman said the men first ordered her husband and the guide to strip naked before they were tried to trees.

Then they turned to the woman.

Her clothes were torn off, her hands were bound and her blonde hair was chopped off with bush knives. She was then raped one by one by the gang for a terrifying 20 minutes.

Her ordeal ended only when something in the forest startled the gang and they ran away.

The U.S. couple’s guide managed to break free and released them, before they all ran naked along jungle tracks for several hours, determined to put as much distance as possible between themselves and the scene of the attack in case the gang came back.

Eventually they reached a remote village where they were given some clothing and from where they were able to raise the alarm.

Violence: The woman, who was on her fifth visit to Papua New Guinea, was conducting research into exotic birds and climate change on the remote island off the country’s northern coast

Remote: The 32-year-old academic was working on remote Karkar Island during her fifth trip to Papua New Guinea when she was attacked

They later made their way back to Madang, on the northern coast of the mainland, before flying to the capital Port Moreseby.

A local photographer working for AFP helped the couple file police reports and organise a flight out of the country.

‘This story should not come out just because I am white,’ said the woman, who was on her fifth visit to the country since her first trip in 2010. She would stay for up to four months conducting her research into exotic birds and the impact of climate change on the forest.

‘My story should come out in the hopes that it empowers Papua New Guinean women to stand up and say no more violence against women in this country,’ said the woman, who did not want to reveal her identity.

‘I hope my story can make a change.’

But senior police admit they have heard such calls before from tribal women all around Papua New Guinea.

Wives suffer extreme violence in some cases from their husbands over domestic issues, and brutal punishments are handed out to women accused of witchcraft, which is practised in remote parts of the country.

In February a 20-year-old mother accused of witchcraft was dragged from her village, taken to a rubbish dump, stripped and burned alive near Mount Hagen, in the centre of the country.

And earlier this month an elderly woman was beheaded with a bush knife after being accused of sorcery.

The U.S. woman’s terrifying story has been reported to the US Embassy in Port Moresby, but a duty officer today gave no comment.

A spokesman for the police in Port Moresby said a statement had been taken but no arrests had been made.

Read more: Mail Online

Rihanna certainly had an action-packed Saturday.

And she made sure to dress the part with three costume changes for the day’s events, celebrating ‘weed day’ on April 20 or better known as 4/20.

But her final ensemble for the evening’s festivities was the skimpiest and most flattering of them all as she headed to a nightclub in Ft. Lauderdale, Florida, after a crowd-pleasing performance for her Diamonds world tour.

Skimpy appearance: After her concert in Ft. Lauderdale, Florida, Rihanna hit up a local nightclub in a form-revealing outfit, on Saturday

Lean and long: The Barbadian singer bared her midriff in her daring ensemble

The Barbadian songstress donned strappy stilettos for the night on the town.

The black footwear added more than a few inches to her height and nicely showcased her sun kissed legs after her sweaty dance routine onstage just hours before.

Skin art: The 25-year-old showed off her discreet tattoos

The Diamonds (In The Sky) recording artist also wore statement earrings as she sported pink lipstick and white nail polish.

And it was a good thing that Rihanna donned the daring outfit as she got a surprise visit from a certain South American Victoria’s Secret Angel just prior to her nightclub appearance.

Vogue: ‘Only bad b*****s get backstage on the #DIAMONDSWorldTour #nobasiczone,’ Rihanna said of model Adriana Lima

Adriana Lima popped by to congratulate the singer and blow a few coy kisses to the camera as the two posed for some playful snaps backstage.

The Brazilian model attended the concert in a ripped vest and leather leggings.

Rihanna playfully captioned a snap of the two of them: ‘Only bad b*****s get backstage on the #DIAMONDSWorldTour #nobasiczone.’

In the photograph Lima can be seen affectionately kissing the singer’s cheek.

Happy 4/20: Rihanna toasted her fans with a shout out to ’4/20′, a term founded by a group of High School students in 1971

After her dance heavy performance onstage, the adventurous singer indulged in a 4/20 treat, as evidenced by her Twitter, where she posted a photograph of a cake in the shape of a marijuana leaf.

‘What did I do to deserve the epicness that is my fans??!!’ she wrote in a caption accompanying the photograph, indicating that the dessert came from an admirer.

The singer toasted her fans with a celebratory smoke, writing, ‘#420 it’s a celebration b******!! Thank you to all my ft. Lauderdale and Miami fam that came through #DWT #backstageLife.’

What a gift: ‘What did I do to deserve the epicness that is my fans??!!’ the singer wrote of the tasty treat

Smoking hot! Rihanna rode her blue bike in a thigh skimming sweater dress

The afternoon prior to her evening’s performance onstage, Rihanna unleashed a slew of pouty pictures on Instagram.

She posted a series of heavily filtered shots onto the picture sharing website, including one of her on a bicycle, a far cry from her sexy moves onstage.

For one picture the Umbrella singer sat posing with her pals, writing: ‘Our #420 on #420 #clique’, referring to the day – a term founded by a group of High School students in 1971.

Baby got back: The singer flashed her backside before turning to assess the crowd

Later on, for the onstage antics, Rihanna stunned in a pair of embroidered black hotpants, a sheer long-sleeved tunic layered over a studded bra and thigh-high leather boots with gold detailing.

The star’s bondage-inspired stage costumes were designed by Givenchy’s Riccardo Tisci.

The Umbrella diva, known for her changes in hair colour, has settled on a mottled auburn shade for her Diamonds World Tour.

‘Can you handle this?’: Rihanna couldn’t resist indulging fans in a string of questionable dance moves during a Florida stop of her Diamonds World Tour